Beach 'awesomeness'

I'm sitting in a downpour watching beach volleyball. Does that seem strange to anyone? They don't postpone spring break, start the partying a little later?

Well, in fact there might be something poetic about this. Kerri Walsh and Misty May-Treanor, the dominant force of women's beach volleyball, are leading the party, but also playing a real sport. Real athletes. Real training.

Gold medal. They beat China's Jie Wang and Jia Tian 21-18, 21-18 today to win gold in the Olympics for the second straight time.

''I don't even know ... just so many things,'' Walsh said, trying to explain. ''I'm a blessed girl. Crazy conditions. We feel like warriors. Just eight years of awesomeness.''

That's it. She captured it. Eight years of awesomeness, and that's this mad rush of a blend of sport and party and sex appeal. But in the downpour, the party dampens some and the sport shines through.

The truth is, you cannot separate these things, and the beach volleyball people don't want you to, anyway.

But maybe we should take this thing seriously.

'ADD FUEL'

This has got to be a culture clash for the Chinese, watching women in bikinis play in the sand to blaring music and a whacked out p.a. announcer, on a world stage for the Olympics. Imagine a woman in the stands holding a Chinese flag, dancing in front of this.

Boom, boom, boom. You get lost in the beat. ''Add fuel,'' the p.a. guy yells.

''Add fuel,'' the crowd yells back.

Add fuel.

That's the translation, anyway.

''Everybody on your feet,'' p.a. guy yells. May-Treanor spikes the ball, and the guy yells, ''U-S-A.'' And the crowd goes along with it, even though we're in China and the opponent is Chinese.

The crowd chants ''Chi-na,'' and then ''USA.'' It goes back and forth, and you think this might be angry fans. But no, each side waits for the other to complete its chant. This is rhythmic clapping, rhythmic chanting. Everyone is here together.

Walsh and May-Treanor have won 108 consecutive matches. They have now won 82 of their last 83 international tournaments. Can you imagine? This is the greatest combination, the biggest domination in hybrid sports/party history.

Is this some sort of dynasty?

''I don't know about dynasty,'' May-Treanor said. ''Maybe legends.''

Walsh and May-Treanor are an amazing example of teamwork. They have been together so long that they always know exactly what the other one is going to do.

Walsh is 6-3, and it's nearly impossible to stop her spike. May-Treanor is great at everything else.

Walsh said she had a dream about rain a night earlier, and that she considers rain good luck. As for the sense they have for each other on court, May-Treanor said they feel ''tied together with a 10-foot rope.''

''I like to say it's a Jedi mind trick because we've been together for so long.''

Eight years of awesomeness. I love that.

YES, THERE'S HYPOCRISY

Everyone in the crowd wore a plastic baggie over their bodies. Pink, blue, green or yellow. Dark clouds hovered, but the place was packed with color.

May-Treanor spikes on into a Chinese player's stomach: ''HEAVY HEAT,'' p.a. guy yells.

Both are going to take a break from the game after this season to start a family. But Walsh said they might be back by the London Games in 2012. They haven't looked that far ahead yet.

May-Treanor spread some of her mom's ashes in the sand before the tournament, as she did before the Athens Games. Walsh's wedding ring slipped off her finger earlier in the week, and they had to use metal detectors hours later to find it.

It's the absurd mixed with the serious.

During breaks, they blare tunes new and old. Once the dancing girls rocked to bagpipe music. Once it was ''La Bamba'' and ''Sex Bomb.''

Yes, sex bomb. And if you are taking this sport seriously and denying that you noticed these women were wearing bikinis, then you are a liar.

Of course they sell sex. And you can be worked up about it as an outrage, or you can loosen up and join the party. Honestly, I've done both.

Hypocritical? I suppose. But it's just a great party mixed with great athletes.

''Awesome,'' Walsh said. ''It was awesome.''

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Photo: Natacha Pisarenko, AP / Kerri Walsh (left) and Misty May-Treanor celebrate their 21-18, 21-18 beach volleyball gold-medal victory over a Chinese team earlier today in Beijing. ;